Biopsy Day

My dear friend Ruth picked me up early & we first stopped in to the Dalton Clinic for my treatment which takes about an hour.  Then we took off for the gateway building.  After a few false leads, we finally got there.  That place is like a maze.  Every time I need something else done it is in a different part of the maze.  I’m getting better, but I doubt I’ll ever really learn my way around.  They keep renovating and I keep forgetting to bring a bag of bread crumbs.

We finally got to the right place and checked in.  Apparently they didn’t really have many beds available in the radiology unit so I got to go up to a private room on another floor.  Go me! 

I got undressed and put on the  oh so fashionable hospital wear designed to flash the world your hiney. The nurse came in and gave me an IV, my favorite thing in the whole world!  Then they wheeled me down to a very big room with cabinets lining one wall and a sonogram machine in the middle.  Sorry Brian, the cabinets were locked and I was on a table.  Maybe next time.

I should probably describe where this naughty lymph node is located.  It is just inside of the left leg where it attaches to the torso, you know where I’m talking about, the left side of my privates.  This is the most action that area has seen well, ever.  There were 2 doctors, 2 nurses & a resident staring at my privates.  It was unnerving.

The nurses were really nice and we got started and I got prepped.  Carol gave me a lovely cocktail so I wouldn’t feel anything but I was awake the whole time.  Your eyes go wonky for about 30 seconds then everything evened out.  My nurses used the sonogram machine to find the right lymph node.  That took a few minutes as the machine had clarity issues.  They got that ironed out and took a few pictures.  Then the doctors came in and I got to see the gargantuan needle they were going to use.  This needle was significantly larger than the one Daddy uses to inoculate the cattle.  They actually had to slice a little to get the needle in as this was just a guide for the needle that they would use to take the tissue.  They used the sonogram machine so they could see where they were aiming.  It was kind of cool to watch.  Thank heaven I couldn’t feel anything!  It took a few tries to get it aimed properly.  I'm pretty sure the bruise is going to be impressive.  Then they pulled out the needle which would take the tissue, it wasn’t small either.  Damn it took a long time for that needle to go in.  They said there would be a pop as it got through the lymph node.  Apparently the little buggers are kind of tough, they really had to push.  I thought they would come out my leg.

They pulled the needle out, & put the tissue on a slide for the pathology Doctor to check.  She gave them the thumbs up and we were done.  This was easy, I’d be home soon – Not!

Apparently you are not allowed to stand up for 4 hours after this kind of procedure because it takes that long for things to start healing properly.  They want you to have a nice start before you leave the hospital.  They didn’t tell me this until I ate the lovely lunch and drank the fluids they gave me.  Then I needed to use the toilet.  They brought a bed pan.  Oh the humiliation.  It isn’t easy trying to relax enough to urinate in a bowl while sitting on a bed.  I spent my life thinking urinating in a bed just wasn’t acceptable.  Now they were asking me to pee in a bowl, in a bed.  It just wasn’t natural!  This goes against everything I’ve been taught.  It was creepy.  I apologized profusely to the nurse who took the bed pan.  She laughed and said this was nothing.  Well, I still thought it was humiliating.  But then, what do I know?

As soon as I was allowed to get up and dressed, I excused myself to the restroom.  Ah the relief!

Thank heaven for Ruth and her patience.  She sat with her kindle and waited all day for me.  She is a wonderful friend.

Today is my day to recover.  I’m not allowed to lift anything heavy.  I thought a little lounging with a book, then some light cleaning and then to finish packing for my girls weekend in DC.  I do need to go fill a scrip this afternoon, but first a nap.